After a divorce, everything changes. The parents must create the way to co-exist in peace and ensure that children do not feel that they, too, have been divorced. If you have a shared custody, you can get it to work, for the good of your children.
Have a good relationship
Get along with your ex is complicated, in particular if they have been damaged. But in order for shared custody may be given, it is essential to have a good relationship; at least, this should be cordial and without ill-treatment. If not, if there is mutual respect, each time you have to be seen to be a nuisance and the children will be affected inevitably.
See the discipline from the same perspective
De-authorize the other parent is very counterproductive. You should never be desacreditarse to each other in terms of how to discipline the children. If one imposes a punishment for some bad behavior, the other should respect that, even though it has not happened in his presence. So, the children will be at a neutral ground, in which both are the good of the film and not only one of the 2.
Not to define the former as a bad parent
Being separated or divorced does not automatically imply that you have failed as a parent. You also should transmit this negative idea to the children.
Respect the opinion of the other
If you have to converse with your ex-partner, you should be prepared to consider what he says; although you may not agree, you can listen to, and think about how he or she sees things. After all, you have the right to give their opinion in regards to their children. Ask for their opinion before deciding on something, and note their expressions. Should be viewed as a united team, even though they no longer live in the same house.